Urban Terror
Team Type: Underworld Denizens
Coach: Daniel H
When I took over as manager, the team was officially classified as “uninsurable”, “ethically indefensible”, and “already dead on paper”. That’s when a pharmaceutical company approached me with what they called a mutually beneficial opportunity. They had experimental drugs. I had goblins, snotlings, skaven… and a trolley. The contract was simple: they sponsor the team, supply unlimited prototypes, and in return we provide field testing under authentic match conditions (fire, claws, explosions, and referee negligence).
The players were informed. The goblins signed immediately. The snotlings ate the paperwork. The skaven asked if the effects were permanent, then signed anyway and the troll must have mistaken the paperwork with a faeces swab test. The meds are administered by pushing a trolley onto the pitch between drives. It carries syringes, inhalers, glowing tonics, and one big red button labelled “DO NOT PRESS (AGAIN)”. So far, the results are outstanding. Goblins regenerate faster than they can be counted. Snotlings briefly develop higher brain functions before exploding. Skaven sprint so fast they sometimes score last week. Side effects include violent mood swings, extra teeth, backwards knees, and one incident where a player became legally classified as “equipment”. The league has raised concerns. The sponsor insists this is all part of Phase Three. Nobody knows what Phase One or Two were. Until the trials end, or the supply runs out, we’ll keep pushing the boundaries of medicine, morality, and basic survivability. After all, in Blood Bowl, if they’re still screaming, the treatment is working.
Special Rules: Bribery & Corruption
League Type: Underworld Challenge